Is it better to have loved and lost, than to ever have loved at all??

Is it better to have loved and lost, than to ever have loved at all?

this is a very debatable question. yes or no?

Yes: many people believe that losing someone you love is better than having not loved before, they say this because at least they have known the feeling of love, and they know the good that comes from this feeling of love. they believe that the food that comes from love, even after it is gone far outweighs the negative emotions that comes when that feeling is gone.

No: the other side of the argument. some people think no, it is better to have not loved at all the argument for this question is that not knowing what love feels like is better than feeling love and then having your whole world taken from you.

these are both good arguments.

to me i agree with both, it just depends on the person. some people have never felt love before, and some people have had love and have had it taken away from them. sometimes it just depends on the person which is worse, so this argument is questionable.

for a while i have never felt the love of others. all i wanted was to have someone love me. and care for me, but it was a long time bore i got that. love is an amazing feeling, but it does suck to have it taken away.

i cannot express how that feels. all i can say is that i don't think that any person can tell you how either one of those feels. i believe it is a personal opinion. 

so i am about done with this. i put my faith in people and they screw me over. i give my heart to my "friends" and they rip it out without so much as a word, let alone an explanation. i always put others needs before my own.


Matthew 7:3-5 "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye."


to me this verse is saying to put your own problems (issues) before others, i do not do that. i always put the people i care about's problems before my own. when i pray, i pray for others. i hardly ever pray for something that i need or want. i don't feel that i deserve anything, i care so much about the people i love. i only pray for them and there needs. even in everyday life, if i have a problem, yes, i want to talk about it, but i would rather help other people instead of them helping me.


yes, i say "i love you" more than most people, but i only say to very few people, 3, in fact. i only say it to people who i truly do love, people that i care so much for that it hurts when i don't get to see them.


but what hurts the most out of anything in life? first off, i'm fine with them not feeling the same way. yes, i do want someone to care for me and want me around and someone who honestly wants me to be their friend, instead of them just being my friend.


...


everybody hurts the people they love, but you forgive them, because you love them. but when people give up on that friendship, that relationship, that is what hurts more than anything else in the world. when your friends turn their back on you and stop caring. that is what hurts the most.


like many of you know i have been through a lot of shit in my life, but the things that haunt me today are not those things directly. the abuse from my father doesn't bother me, the abuse from the camp counselor doesn't bother me, the abuse from my mother and grandmother doesn't bother me. 


what bothers me is the lack of friends. the lack of parents. it makes me sad when i here people talking about how awesome their dads are. when they talk about all the fun times they had with their friends growing up. that depresses me because i don't have that. here now, when people call me gay and pick on my, that depresses me. i have grown up with that my whole life, i haven't had friends because everyone believed i was gay. i was excluded from just about everything in high school. i have never had friends until i got here at OC. 


and when the people here are supposed to be good people, and they treat me the EXACT same way as everyone else has treated me. it hurts. it probably hurts a lot more than it should. 


at the beginning of the school year i had many "friends". one by one these friends left me. good thing i had some more friends to fall back on. but the "friends" who lasted the longest, the "friends" who saw what the others did and how they treated me, the "friends" who said that they wouldn't treat me that way. yeah, no surprise that they end up leaving too, right?


and that one person that i have in my life, the one person that is there throughout everything that doesn't leave. leaves. so i end up hurting because she left. the only way i could get over our relationship is to move on. just leave her behind, so that's what i do. and that may not be the productive way to do things but it is the only way that helps me get over someone. to cut all ties, burn bridges. now i did try to contact and talk to these people before i decide to do this and if they give me no ground.


but there are people out there that care for me, i just have to hang on until i find them.

I'm the friend you all ditch when something better comes up.

You never ask if I want to join you, or invite me over. I have no real friends.

And what's the point of trying when it only deepens my deppression and lessens my eating? I hope you are proud.

You've destroyed my trust once again.